Modern Dating
Speed Dating: The Secret to a Successful Modern Romance
You don’t have enough time to meet new people. It’s hard to be certain that you both want the same thing. You don’t know if the person you’re talking to online is real or not.
These are just some of the common reasons why a lot of people have such a difficult time looking for love nowadays.
While it’s tempting to say that these are all poor excuses that shouldn’t stop anyone from going after what they really want, there is merit to most of these concerns. After all, modern technology doesn’t always mean successful modern romance.
This is why the solution I’m proposing is familiar to many people and relatively low-tech.
It’s been around for a while and may just be the answer you’ve been looking for: speed dating.
What Is Speed Dating?
You sign up and are given a date, time, and location. You disclose a few details about yourself, usually your name, age, and dating preferences.
You show up to an event and meet fellow single people with whom you get a few minutes each to have a conversation about who you are and what it is you’re both looking for in a romantic partner.
If someone special catches your eye, or there’s one interaction that stands out among the rest, then you get a chance to ask that person out on your own time.
That’s pretty much what speed dating is.
The key feature is having someone else organize the meeting and being given the opportunity to get to know not just a lot of new people but also people you know are looking for the exact same thing you are: a chance at true love.
According to a study conducted at Northwestern University and published in the journal Personal Relationships, speed dating is a great avenue for nurturing genuine romantic attraction.
Once considered an international phenomenon, it also helps people meet compatible romantic partners even from different countries.
Speed Dating Rules
Each event will have its own rules and guidelines, but below are the usual best practices for speed dating:
- Don’t be late.
- Give everyone a chance, even those you’re not immediately attracted to.
- Be respectful even if you don’t feel any spark. Leave a conversation early only as a last resort.
- Stick to common speed dating topics like love and relationships. Avoid asking about things that are too personal or controversial.
- Ask questions and contribute as much as the other person in making your conversation engaging.
- Just because you met someone you like doesn’t mean you shouldn’t let them meet and talk to other people.
- Respect personal space and don’t initiate unwanted physical touch.
Does Speed Dating Work?
In an article by USA Today in 2024, many dating coaches and relationship experts have shared that speed dating seems to be making a comeback, especially among younger people.
To combat the epidemic of loneliness that’s plaguing the modern dating scene and as an alternative for those who just aren’t having much luck with dating apps, more and more single folks are signing up for real-life meetups with others in a similar situation.
Of course, how successful you are will still depend on a lot of factors that only you can determine.
Did you give people a chance to make a lasting impression? Were you sincere about what you shared? Did you put your best foot forward in your interactions?
You have to be willing to take every opportunity that’s available to you, and speed dating may very well be the one opportunity that can lead you to true love.
References
Finkel, Eli, Paul Eastwick, and Jacob Matthews. 2007. “Speed-dating as an invaluable tool for studying romantic attraction: A methodological primer.” Personal Relationships 14, no. 4 (March).
Trepany, Charles. 2024. “Speed dating is making a comeback as Gen Z ditches dating apps. We shouldn’t be surprised.” USA Today. https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/health-wellness/2024/04/03/speed-dating-is-making-a-comeback-is-gen-z-done-with-dating-apps/73187068007/.
