Romanticists vs Realists: Dating Standards 101

Romanticist philosophers believed that we should follow our hearts and live for love, while realist philosophers advocate for rational love. As a result, romanticist thinkers tended to have more forgiving dating standards than their counterparts in the realist school of thought.

Likewise, we all have our own ideas of what makes someone attractive, which is why there are so many dating standards out there.

Some people prefer keeping things realistically casual, while others want a potential partner who shares their romantic beliefs about marriage and having kids.

Finding that balance between what you want and what the other person wants can be tricky, but not impossible.

In this article, we will explore the differences between romanticists and. realists in dating. We will also help you figure out which one you are.

What’s the difference between romanticists and realists?

Romanticism and realism are two different philosophies.

Romanticism is a style of literature and art that is characterized by the emotional, imaginative, and exotic. Romanticists find beauty in things that are not seen every day. They have an idealistic view of love, life, and what it means to be human.

On the other hand realism emphasizes the ordinary or everyday aspects of life. So realists value the honesty and accuracy of love over imagination or fantasy.

That said, an emphasis on emotion and individualism characterizes romanticism as a general fascination with the past, while realists believe that the truth should be presented without embellishment, exaggeration, or distortion.

Significantly, both have different standards of what makes a good dating experience.

What are the romantic and realistic ideals of dating?

Dating standards vary for every person. This is especially true when it comes to dating and relationships among people who grew up in different generations.

But in general, there’s a clear distinction between the realistic practices that our parents taught us about love and the romantic ideals of what dating is like for most people our age.

Prior to the 21st century, most people got married as soon as they were old enough to get their license, often before they even graduated high school. Likewise, dating to marry was the norm, and arranged marriages were prevalent among families, mainly for the elevation of economic status over love.

But with the rise of technology and online dating sites, dating standards have changed drastically over the past few decades. Today’s youth place a much higher emphasis on appearances when choosing partners and fantasizing about their romantic ideals with the onslaught of romanticism in popular culture, such as films, music, etc.

Nowadays, dating is not something that most people take seriously until much later in life. Many teenagers are stuck in the hook-up culture and easily break up once their romantic needs aren’t met.

However, the 2022 statistics indicate that at least 17% of online daters found a partner through online dating sites with committed long-term relationships, and over 20% of people from the LGBTQ + community ended up marrying their partners whom they met online.

Which one are you?

When it comes to dating, there are two schools of thought on what the right standards should be — namely romanticism and realism.

Some believe that the best type of person to be in a relationship with is someone who is your soulmate and can bring you up to Cloud 9. These people are known as romanticists.

To exemplify, you are a romanticist if you believe that relationships should be about staying in and watching Netflix together and going on dates at quaint cafes and museums, as well as having similar interests and levels of intellect in order to keep things interesting.

On the other hand, some people think that the best type of person to date is someone with whom you share common ground. They call themselves realists.

They believe that truth is found in everyday life, and they look for love there. They are also not interested in fantasy or imagination, but instead focus on what could be called “the facts of life.”

For instance, you can be identified as a realist if you believe that you should only be going on first dates with people you could see yourself marrying one day. You should also be looking for someone with realistic standards who wants to commit to you for the long haul.

Which one is better?

The Romanticist vs Realist debate has been going on for centuries now, with each side claiming its own superiority over the other. However, this article will try to take a more unbiased approach to their dating standards.

Essentially, one thing is no better than the other.

Comparatively, romanticists believe that the best dating experience is one where you are able to get to know someone in a more superficial way. Meanwhile, realists adhere to the dating standards of knowing each other in an intimate way.

Ultimately, it’s important to note that romanticists and realists are not mutually exclusive. Both romanticists and realists can be found in the same person. It’s just that they have different opinions on what makes a good dating experience.

If you want, you can make the most of both worlds and find balance by adhering to the best dating standards of each philosophy.