Rewriting Our Views on Being in Love
Most of us think being in love plays out in two ways: indescribable joy or a total disaster. Apparently, there’s no in-between! Pick your poison: a couple attached to the hip until fate drives them apart, or a story portraying a tragic love affair.
We’re all aware that relationships are more complicated than stereotypes. Despite that knowledge, we still fall for misguided ideas about romance anyway. Why? Author and professor Carrie Jenkins lays the reason out:
We put romantic love on a pedestal, assuming that someone’s partner typically comes first in their lives: before their family, their friends, their communities, or anything else.
This view holds us back from properly understanding what love can truly be. Perhaps it’s time to rewrite the script. The question is, how do we do that?
The following pills may be tough to swallow, but their sobering effects will help rather than harm.
Romance won’t save you
Picture this: someone sweeps you off your feet and saves you from despair. This sounds like something straight from a fairy tale, yes? Unfortunately, love and relationships don’t work that way in reality.
A great partner is a welcome addition to anyone’s life. Who wouldn’t want a life companion? The thing is, they aren’t your saviors — you are! Only you can fix whatever wound or mistake from the past.
Love won’t magically fix everything
Relationships aren’t medications that make life instantly better. Just like how they’re not saving us from anything, they won’t turn everything into sunshine and rainbows either.
It’s nice to have our partners in our corner, but they don’t have the remedy for your sadness. If you want to see yourself in another (and healthier) light, the work begins with YOU.
No, you’re not worthless if you’re single
We’ve seen this scenario too many times: someone gets dumped and wallows in misery about their newly-single status. While grieving their breakup, some believe they aren’t worth anything or anyone.
It’s understandable to feel sad about breakups. However, it’s another story if you brand yourself as a worthless person in the aftermath.
Don’t let society’s views on singlehood cloud you — being single isn’t the end of the world! You may be alone at the moment, but that doesn’t mean you’ll be lonely for the rest of your life.
Relationships aren’t always a straight shot
Even though falling in love feels magical, it’s not a reward for or result of good deeds. Our relationships don’t play out the way we do because of fate; the outcomes are what they are because of our choices.
Love won’t be a smooth-sailing experience 100% of the time because problems are inevitable. Relationships don’t follow a linear path, so brace yourself for some bumps in the road.
You don’t have to suffer for love
The modern dating scene has gotten attached to the idea of suffering for romance. Some people believe they need to endure toxicity in the name of love. However, we shouldn’t be experiencing such misery! Relationships come with ups and downs, but the challenges shouldn’t be constant and frequent.
If you want a better love story for yourself, now’s the time to flip your script on relationships. Being in love doesn’t mean sticking to stereotypical narratives that’ll get you nowhere.
