Online Dating

Are Online Dating Apps Bad for Men Who Want Marriage?

Marta Levchenko
4 min readJan 9, 2025
A man in a white shirt holding a mobile phone
Photo by NordWood Themes on Unsplash

Though it’s undeniable that modern technology has had a huge impact on romance, there are some who claim that the changes aren’t always for the better.

Many people who find online dating apps bad for men, especially those who are looking for long-term commitments, believe that the internet isn’t the best place for anyone to meet the person they’ll fall in love with — the woman they’ll want to marry.

But is this really true? And if so, what could be the main reason behind it?

Why Dating Apps Don’t Work for Men

A lot of people say that online dating is more challenging for men because the system is built to cater to the needs and whims of women.

But according to the Pew Research Center, men are more likely to use a dating site or app than women. Among online daters, more women, or 36% also say that it’s more difficult for them to find someone they’re physically attracted to on the internet compared to men, with only 21% making the same claim.

However, interest and fulfilled preferences don’t always translate to success, and the complaints of those who think dating apps are pointless for guys are more centered on the actual results of their online dating efforts.

Some believe that the gender ratio is skewed, with more men competing against each other. Some also think that men are more likely to be judged according to their physical appearance because women are less forgiving when it comes to their standards.

There are also people who consider online dating apps bad for men because their nature just isn’t conducive for relationships that eventually lead to marriage, which is bad news for guys who are looking for their future wives.

Looking for Marriage through Online Dating

If you see online dating as an avenue for casual relationships, then you likely have more success with dating apps than others.

But men who wish to meet their life partner can find the whole thing a little more challenging. Not only are apps fast-paced and erratic, but they can also keep things superficial and not always ideal for getting to know someone properly.

It’s hard to learn if you’re compatible with someone for a lifelong commitment when your interactions are limited to text messages and virtual conversations.

It’s also difficult to ask a lady how many kids she wants, what kind of home she dreams of building, and whether or not she sees you as husband material when you have yet to meet each other in person.

Online Dating Isn’t All about Apps

If a guy really needs to meet a woman in person and spend time with her to determine if she’s the one for him, then are all online dating apps bad for men who want true and long-lasting love?

Most dating apps may be, but online dating isn’t just limited to popular apps that rely on algorithms and encourage shallow interactions.

Meeting someone in person is indeed important to get to know them deeply.

It’s also true that it can be easy for a woman to pretend she has serious feelings for you online when she really doesn’t.

But those are pitfalls for people who only use trending apps and see online dating as the end goal. It’s different if you have the right perspective: that there are other methods of finding love online beyond apps and online dating is just the beginning of your journey, not the whole of it.

For guys who want genuine relationships that lead to marriage, there are online dating platforms that can connect you with women who are looking for the same thing — websites and companies that give traditional dating practices a place in the modern world.

If apps aren’t your cup of tea, then that’s okay, as long as you don’t give up on online dating entirely if you know you haven’t explored everything it has to offer just yet.

References

Anderson, Monica, Emily A. Vogels, and Erica Turner. 2020. “Online Dating: The Virtues and Downsides.” Pew Research Center. https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2020/02/06/the-virtues-and-downsides-of-online-dating/.

McClain, Colleen, and Risa Gelles. 2023. “1. The who, where and why of online dating in the U.S.” Pew Research Center. https://www.pewresearch.org/internet/2023/02/02/the-who-where-and-why-of-online-dating-in-the-u-s.

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